Two Arabian Knights

1   
France - - 1918.

2
"Playing safe - - eh,
       Soldier?"

3
"We're dead men!"

4
"You mean - - we'll
 never get out of here
       alive?"

5
"You've booted and 
 bullied me all the 
 way from Hoboken,
   Sergeant - -"

6
"- - now I'm going to
 knock your ugly block 
 off before the Germans 
        get us!"

7
"Get up and fight!"

8
"Never lead with your 
   right, Soldier!"

9
Prisoners from the
  Allied forces - -
  Americans, French,
English, Belgians,
    Arabs - -

10
A prison camp in
Northern Germany.

11
"As the highest in rank,
 you will take charge of
        your men."

12
"March them to the
 de-lousing station."

13
"How's your ankle now, 
     gold-brick?"

14
The Cooties' Crematory.

15
"The sooner I get out 
 of here, the better I'll 
        like it!"

16
"I couldn't hold out 
 on a good guy like 
      you - -"

17
Days spent working out
 a way to escape. Nights
 spent watching for a
   chance to use it.

18
"When things quiet 
 down, we'll try 
     again."

19
"Our uniforms will stick 
 out like sore thumbs 
  against that snow!"

20
"White against white
    won't show!"

21
"We're sunk!"

22
"How's your nerve?"

23
"I'll draw the dog away,
 while you crawl under 
   the first fence."

24
"I had to stop you from
       sneezing!"

25
"I oughta stop you 
  from thinking!"

26 [small type]
"Brains, I'm really disgusted 
        with you."

27
"Swine! That is 
  forbidden!"

28
"They're shipping us 
    to Turkey!"

29
"That's Constantinople -
  we'd better start 
      thinking."

30
"If you keep on thinking,
 we'll wind up in China!"

31
"If I ever listen to you 
 again, I hope you 
 spit in my mess-kit!"

32
"Quit crabbing! If it
 wasn't for me, we
 wouldn't be where
     we are!"

33
"Well, where are we?"

34
"Suffering catfish - -
     what next?"

35
The hay was about 
 to set sail for 
     Arabia.

36
"Americansky - yes?"

37
"Oh, no! Chinese!"

38
"How you come here?"

39
"Ask Brains - he knows!"

40
"We came together!"

41
"Together, I put you 
      in irons!"

42
"Why doesn't someone 
 jump in and help them?"

43
"Cold water!"

44
"Never mind me!
 Save the girl!"

45
"What's the idea of 
    socking me?"

46
"I thought you were 
 going to sneeze."

47
"I can hardly wait for 
 my uniform to dry 
 so I can see her."

48
"Me too!"

49
"One flash at that pan 
 of yours, and she'll yell 
        for Allah!"

50
"I've had more broads 
 yell for me than you 
 and this guy Allah 
   put together!"

51
"Just scrubbing down 
 to meet the Masked 
       Marvel."

52
"You wouldn't go 
 without me, would
       you?"

53
"How about introducing 
 us to the dame we 
 saved, instead of taking
 all the bows yourself?"

54
"The lady no understand 
    your language."

55
"The lady that don't 
 understand my 
 language don't live!"

56
"Watch me work, and 
 you'll never be lone-
 some in a strange 
       town!"

57
"If the face is anything 
 like the chassis - - me
        for her!"

58
"I wish I could tell you 
 in Arabic, what I think 
   of you in English."

59
"You're just the
 Preliminary - -
 I'm her Main Event."

60
"Who is that bozo?"

61
"Probably her eunuch."

62
"What's a unick?"

63
The magic of an Asia 
    Minor moon.

64
"Oh, hell!"

65
"You are quite an artist."

66
"You speak English?"

67
"I learned it at school 
  in Constantinople."

68
"When I think of the 
 things we've said in 
    front of you!"

69
"Skunk, where's my 
    pants at?"

70
"The lady's money she
 drown - - I want fare!"

71
"With the lady's per-
 mission, we'll gladly
    pay her fare."

72 [small type]
"Sap - - we ain't
   got a dime!"

73
"I'll pay you later."

74
"I want fare next time 
      I see you."

75
"I quite agree with him."

76
"Where's my pants at?"

77
Dodging the captain
 had one serious
 disadvantage.

78
"I've missed six meals 
 because you wanted 
 to play Santa Claus!"

79
"The boat's anchored
 and her fare hasn't
 been paid - - worry
     that out!"

80
"May I see you a 
 moment, purser?"

81
"You pay fare now -
 or you go in irons!"

82
"Just a slight oversight!"

83
"Here's your money."

84
"My father will repay
        you -"

85
"Slip us a little note 
   to your old man."

86
"My people are coming 
 for me. I must leave 
        you."

87
"He is Shevket Ben
 Ali - the man I am 
     to marry."

88
"The choice was not 
 mine - - in Arabia a
 father's word is law."

89
"We're leaving!"

90
The palace of Mirza's 
 father, ruler of the 
      province.

91
"Allah be praised, my
 daughter, for thy
   safe return!"

92
"This is a happy day,
 Shevket. Tonight we
 sign the marriage
     contract."

93
"There may be no 
 marriage. Mirza's
 servant has told me
 strange things of
 two Americans - -"

94
"He has even said
 she unveiled her 
 face before one of
  the infidels."

95
"Take my guards and 
 seize these Americans 
 who have dishonored 
 me. They must die!"

96
"Let's go to our old 
 man and get our 
 dough - I'm starving!"

97
"For the last time no!
 We're going to the
  American consul!"

98
"There's our breakfast!"

99
"Wrong kind of goat!"

100
Shevket's guards.

101
"E Pluribus Unum!"

102
"That means - -
   you eat!"

103
"Do not soil your 
 blade - I'll bring 
    the guards!"

104
"In Arabia it's an insult
 to show anyone the 
 sole of your shoe."

105
"That's almost as 
 bad as spitting 
  at a person."

106
"Now will you go to 
 her old man and 
 get what's coming 
      to us?"

107
"All right, you win - but
 I hope Shevket doesn't 
   get there first."

108
"I'll read it later!"

109
"It's personal!"

110
"You tell him, you're 
      educated!"

111
"And now, gentlemen -
 to what do we owe 
    this visit?"

112
"I want some dough - -
 he wants to see Mirza - -
 and we both want a little 
 protection on the streets!"

113
"Your wishes shall be 
 granted. Follow me,
 and you will never 
 be bothered on the 
   streets again."

114
"What'll we do now?"

115
"We've got to leave 
 town - - but first
 we're going back 
 to the palace for 
      Mirza!"

116
"If I gotta die - - I'm
 gonna die right here!"

117
"O.K., old pal - - I'll
      go it alone."

118
"I'll see you again - - 
  if I get out alive."

119
"If you make another 
 crack about splitting - "

120
"Where'll we take her 
  when we get her?"

121
"To the American consul.
 When he knows who
 I am, he'll help us."

122
"We've come to take 
     you away."

123
"Your friend is being 
 suitably received in 
 the garden - - and
 I myself have come 
  to welcome you."

124
"If he dies - - I die 
      with him!"

125
"Suppose I stake my 
 life against his, and -
 to the victor belong 
     the spoils?"

126
"One of these pistols
 contains a bullet -
 the other, a blank 
     cartridge!"

127
"No skill is required at
     this distance."

128
"Go in the next room.
 One of us will come 
       to you."

129
"Very well, perhaps you 
   will help us - -"

130
"- strike that gong
 three times. At the
 third stroke, we fire!"

131
"He played fair - -
  please leave us."

132
"Do you think I'd risk 
 my life with a dog?
 Both pistols were
 loaded with blanks!"

133
"But the last shot told
 Mirza of your death -
 to which my servants
  will now attend."

134
"Sorry I can't stay, but
 my carriage - and the
  lady - are waiting."

135
"I can't speak Arabical -
 but I've got a handful 
 of sure death, and I'm 
       nervous!"

136
"Would you mind 
 closing the door?"

137
"You might at least 
 thank me for bringing 
   the lady to you."

138
"Home, James!"

THE END

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